Ode to Whack (Writing Contest)
April 1, 2005 ~ December 14, 2005 This is, or um... was, Whack (as in Whack-a-mole). He was Christ’s Church’s resident mole. He met an accidental and untimely end earlier today when Mike tried to safely remove him from the building with a snow shovel. If you work with an animal rights group, please take note of the word ‘accidental’.
We invite you to tap your creative juices and to eulogize Whack in story or poem. Entry postings should be 100 words or less and posted here in ‘comments’ before December 21st. A winner will be chosen and prizes awarded soon thereafter.
Whack is survived by numerous siblings, cousins and friends. He will be missed.
14 Comments:
Out of our HymnMole:
O Mole that burrows in the soil
We look and ponder why you toil
And know, this world is under curse
For this, we spend out of our purse
To find an end to thee.
D--
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/14/2005 3:16 PM
haha... wow can't top that! ewww!!! that is really gross looking, and mike! you killed it!!! what's next your gonna help move someone's kitty ;-)
By amanda, at 12/14/2005 3:17 PM
Mole Haiku
Tiny mole burrow
Deep into our sacred ground
Early end is yours
D--
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/14/2005 3:32 PM
A News Approach:
Youth Pastor Implicated in Grisly Murder
Amherst, NH--Developing
In a stunning development, Christ's Church youth pastor Mike Knight admitted to brutal murder.
"He had it coming! He was always sneaking around and working to undermine our efforts," said Knight.
Some have questioned if the church might have been hasty in their actions.
"Honest, we just wanted to move him from the propery," said the senior pastor, Darin Shaw.
But others see a more sinister side.
"We believe this is just another Christian Right effort to overwhelm our community," complained a local activist.
"This church claims to use dance and rock music to attract a following. Now they are adopting the techniques of Ozzie Osborne to raise their profile in the community. Where does it stop?"
PETA did not return requests for comment, but rumor has it they will weigh in soon on the case.
The State's Atty General is considering pressing animal endangerment charges.
D--
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/14/2005 3:38 PM
Epitaph:
Alas poor Whack
He really dug our church
D--
can anybody tell I'm avoiding real work today?
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/14/2005 4:11 PM
D...
I knew you would have numerous entries....I just didn't expect so many so soon! You crack me up!
I will join in on this after work! It will give me something to ponder tonight!
Mike...
You whacked a mole? Add this to your list! You're gonna have to change your name to Mikey "The Whack" Knight. The Sopranos are looking for a few new cast members for next season....
By Jackie, at 12/14/2005 4:24 PM
P.S. Bill Murray could have used your help!
By Jackie, at 12/14/2005 4:46 PM
(Scene: Mole spotted in building.)
Darin: Mike! Mole! Move it!
Mike: I'm on it. Where's the 12-gauge...
Darin: No!
Mike: No...what, no shotgun?
Darin: Unsafe! Uncool! Unclean!
Mike: (whining)Awww! Now it's gonna escape.
Darin: (leaves, singing) Do something now!
Time passes... a shovel-pass, complete to Mike, Mike has the handle, he's through the Mole's defensive line, it's down to Mike and the Mole's safety, and... oh, what a hit! Mike goes all the way! Touchdown Mike!
Interviewer: Mike, that was some hit. You totally removed the Mole safety, dude!
Mike: Um... it was an accident?
(95)
By Radioactive Jam, at 12/14/2005 11:19 PM
(shakes head) you guys are hilarious, and are providing a welcome distraction to studying for a final I have tomorrow :-) so thanks!
By amanda, at 12/14/2005 11:35 PM
Pawfoot Predictor
The Pawfoot Predictor has sized up the field and has a certain, take it to the ants, dig through the ground til you find your bookie, claw your way to the top, worm into your heart, burrow into the limelight prediction:
Knight will shovel over Talpidae.
D--
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/15/2005 3:40 AM
When the shovel of the Knight shall smack
And time shall be no more,
And the rodent breaks, infernal
Full of hair;
When the diggers of earth shall gather
Spread out upon the floor,
And the mole is called up yonder
Who will care?
Refrain
When the mole, is called up yon-der,
When the mole, is called up yon-der,
When the mole, is called up yon-der,
When the mole is called up yonder
Who will care?
On that bright and cloudless morning
When the pastor turned his head,
And the form of little Whacky he did see;
When he called unto his chosen one
To gather up the mole
Then the mole was called up yonder, Who did care?
Refrain
Let us fear our dear Youth Pastor
For his aim and shot was off,
Though we know that he is
Filled with love and care;
But that little mole's life's over
Was his work in earth all done?
Tough, the mole's been called up yonder,
Who will care?
Refrain
By Higher Up, Further In, at 12/15/2005 10:17 AM
though my back was turned... I cared... Sharon cares more...
By germaine, at 12/15/2005 3:29 PM
Oh Whack, why wouldn't you listen... WHY?? It didn't have to be this way...
By germaine, at 12/15/2005 3:37 PM
When the Mole is Called up Yonder!! Love it!! You guys are funny!
By Shari, at 12/17/2005 7:38 PM
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